“My Child Has Opie Eye!”


Opie Eye
“My Child Has Opie Eye!”
Opie Eye


7:00 a.m., the silence in the house is broken by my child’s call to me, from another room, “Mom, please take care of my Opie eye!”Huh?…


My mind is spinning trying to process this information, what sort of illness is Opie eye? Is it a variation of Pink eye? What is the cure? What is the cause? Why didn’t I notice it? Why hadn’t I heard of it? I must be a terrible parent. My mind goes back the 1960’s sitcom ‘The Andy Griffith Show’ where Ron Howard played the sheriff’s young son Opie. This must be the reference for Opie eye, I surmised.  I can’t think of a single thing wrong with the adorable little guy’s eyes.


I’m not doing well sorting this out. Then I hear it again, “MOM, Puh-lease take care of my Opie eye…. I can’t go to school until you do!” I decide to go to my child and have a look, perhaps this problem has another name that I’m familiar with. As I walk up to her, tilt her head toward the light and have a look at her eyes she says in her best teenage I’m-disgusted-with-you tone, “What ARE you doing?”


Opie Eye“Why, I’m looking at your eyes. Which one is bothering you?” I counter in my best Doctor Mom voice. To which she flatly retorts, “There is nothing wrong with my eyes.” “Then what is all this about you having Opie eye?” I asked now very confused. She held out an extended hand with a form and a pen. The form that she wanted signed was saying that I have seen and agree with her Spanish teacher’s guidelines for (are you ready) an Oral Proficiency Interview.


That’s right, O.P.I.


In my best Gomer Pyle voice I loudly declare, “Shazzam! Andy call Aunt Bee to bake a pie, my child don’t have Opie eye!” While we laughed ourselves silly over this early morning incident, it provides a very important lesson in business. Nothing defeats your purpose faster than using acronyms that nobody understands.


I have articles submitted to me for publication every day using acronyms that are meaningless to my readers…. they are not published here. I receive publications everyday, that I can not find the web site because the publication is sent as an acronym and I don’t know or can’t remember what the acronym stands for. You can’t sell to people that don’t know what you’re talking about. Therefore, by using acronyms you defeat your purpose and I would advise that you stop P.D.Q. (Pretty Darn Quick) It is your job to educate, not intimidate or confuse your clientelle.



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